Wednesday, November 26, 2008

I'm Not Going To Connect Those Dots

I had an embarassing experience tonight. I went into Hastings to buy a Christmas present for someone (which is amazing considering what a procrastinator I am), and decided on an erotic connect the dots book as an added bonus. I was a little embarassed to even go to the cash register so I carried it under my arm so no one else could see what it was (as if any other people in Hastings on a Tuesday night even care what I'm buying). I get to the cash registers and yippee! I'm the only person in line. I also had a stack of movies to rent so I put the book on top so the cashier would hurry and swipe it and be done with it. But she decides instead to scan all of the movies first so the book just stays there, only for me to realize that a lady I work with has come and stood in line right behind me. "Please don't see it. Please don't see it. I'm not headed home to connect these dots," I kept thinking. I hurried to pay and then did one of those "Oh hey! Yeah, have a good night." I got out of there pretty quickly.
On second thought, I work the overnight and it gets pretty boring. Maybe I won't be giving that away...

Friday, November 14, 2008

It's Snowing!

Its snowing tonight in Laramie. I love the snow even though I hate to be cold. Right now I really miss Woodland Hills, where over the course of winter the snow drifts would reach to heights over my head. My favorite place is in front of our fire place, where I would fall asleep a lot of nights and wake up at 4 a.m., sweaty and with a dry mouth. J-Pants and I are headed to Utah in the morning when I get home from work, and I can't wait. I haven't seen my family since July, which for me is far too long. I'm excited to hug my mom and eat her amazing home cooked Sunday dinner. I'm excited to see a movie with my dad and hear one of his lectures on current events. I'm excited to make incestual jokes with Justin, which makes J-Pants just a bit uncomfortable. I'm excited to hear Verity's current stories on the weirdos that she meets at dances and instantly fall in love with her. And perhaps above all, I'm excited to wrestle with, punch, and stay up late giggling with her:

We leave for Utah in 5 hours but it feels like an eternity.

Monday, November 10, 2008

Mcpoyle infestation of Laramie

After (im)patiently waiting for two weeks, my usb cord for my camera finally came and I was able to upload the pictures of our amazing Mcpoyle costumes. There were only a handful of people in Laramie who recognized us as the Mcpoyles but it was still fun. Most people thought J-Pants and Matt were pedophiles.

For those familiar with the show, J-Pants actually got fork stabbed that night. Matt just didn't know his own strength.
How about that uni-brow eh? People who I didn't even know were referring to me as "the uni-brow" by the end of the night. I think a lot of girls were baffled as to why I went as a Mcpoyle instead of a skanky nurse.

And as for that mustache, I'd like to thank mascara for helping me with my superb 'stache.

Thursday, November 6, 2008

The Rights of Man

It's an amazing time to be an American, we are witnessing the dawn of a new era of Racial equality. What would have seemed impossible a mere 50 years ago has become reality, an African American man in the Whitehouse. It's amazing we can come so far, yet still have so much further to go. It seems the racial discrimination of our fore fathers has been replaced by an anti-gay discrimination of our own.

It's amazing that the American people can simultaneous elect an African American President yet deny the rights of the gays all in the same night. Can no one can recognize the similarities between the civil rights movement and the gay rights movement of today? How can we teach our children that All men are created equal, that they are endowed by their creator with certain inalienable rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of happiness? It seems apparent that marriage is a subset of both Life and Pursuit of Happiness. It does not matter whether homosexuality is a born characteristic or a choice, everyone deserves to feel love. Furthermore, everyone deserves the legal rights that go along with marriage.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

The Diving Bell and the Butterfly

I watched this at 3 a.m. It was beautiful.

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

A Grab-Bag of Blog Topics

I'm sure you've all heard the same thing: never talk about ex-boyfriends or politics on a first date. And seeing as how this is my first blog, I feel that the same rules should apply. So if I remain unaffiliated I think I can get away with talking about my voting experience today.
I had gone in the the county clerks office to vote early a few weeks ago, but when I got there I realized that I didn't recognize most of the names on the ballot. So, deciding to be a good citizen, I decided to research the candidates out and vote on November 4. In the time leading up to November 4 I THOUGHT about looking up the candidates...but didn't. Election day rolls around and I stroll into the polls, undeterred by my lack of knowledge. Still not recognizing most of the names on the ballot, how do I decide to vote? I went with the last names that most amused me. I voted for Hugh McGinley because his name made me think of a crusty drunkard, sobering up just long enough to make it to the hospital district trustees meeting once a week. And of course I circled Nick Carter for the United States senate. Who wouldn't want a backstreet boy representing them?! And because of my vote there may be a school district trustee now named Julie Radosevich, because she sounds czech enough to be related distantly.

Some may say my voting technique is irresponsible, and to those people I say "You are right".

J-Pants humored me last night and watched The Strangers with me. I'm a sucker for scary movies. All in all it scared the pants off of me, and I may have screamed like a little girl several times. The movie must have been a success though, because I was scared to be alone after it was over and had to sit in the bathroom while J-Pants showered.

My only question about the movie was why the two girls got awesome masks while the guy looks like he's wearing a pair of saggy underwear. "Oh, hey Ted. We forgot to get you a you'll have to make do with these."

I may have found the coolest place in Laramie. Its called Bart's Flea Market and its spectacular. I went there yesterday just looking for a coffee table and ended up spending 2 hours wandering the store, looking through the "treasures". I wanted to wash my hands afterwards, but they have every weird item you could possibly imagine from your childhood. Remember the rollerblading doll that could move by herself (yeah, the one I really wanted but had to play with at a friends house)? They have one in mint condition. They also have all the California Raisin crap you could ever want.
Here's a whole wall of sweet hats. I was finally forced to leave at closing time. But don't you worry Bart's, I'll be back.

Two more things of note, but not worth a whole blog:

I was in line behind this lady the other day and she had the most severe case of "mom butt" I had ever seen. Don't worry, I was very sneaky in taking this picture. Impressed much?

Dear J-Pants,
Thanks for playing barrel of monkies with me, even though you hate games like that.

Love love love, Ash